I cannot control my emotions. How to keep emotions in check

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Every person dreams of being happy, achieving success, creating a prosperous family. To do this, he creates plans, defines his goals and objectives, imagining in advance a plan for their solution and their own actions. But it is common for a person to be distracted, to forget about everything that he has planned, succumbing to a momentary desire or action that does not at all correspond to the chosen plan of actions. Distracted by a fleeting desire, it is common for an individual not only to forget about the plans he has built, but it is also difficult to return to their implementation. The reason for all this is the lack of the personality of the ability to control their actions, desires and emotions. The ability to control one's own "I" is the strength of an individual's character that helps to hold on to unnecessary emotions, to take control of feelings, the ability to act purposefully at any time, to restrain impulsive urges, while following established norms and rules of behavior.

Deprived of self-control of his own emotional states and feelings, a person is able to easily succumb to them and commit uncontrollable, rash acts. The ability to restrain and self-control are those qualities of character that most people lack in the modern world. Due to the presence of different types and different upbringing of individuals, situations called conflicts very often occur. Emotionality of a person, lack of self-control skills, control of their own emotions, leads to disastrous consequences, changes in the mental state of the individual, the development of aggression. Therefore, how to learn to control yourself and not get angry is not an easy question, but one of the most frequently asked psychologists.

A person experiences deep respect, admiration and, most importantly, the desire to become like that, looking at a person who is able to control emotions, act in accordance with set goals, capable of achieving success without being distracted by petty desires, focusing on the main thing, separating the secondary from the truly important.

How to control yourself and not get nervous? Realize that this is a necessary quality of the personality, find a point of contact that prompts you to agree with your own "I". Restraint and ability to control helps regulate the levels of emotional expression, which allows you to achieve success in various areas, the most important thing is to establish mental balance and maintain a healthy psyche. Having the quality of control allows an individual to feel protected, to achieve personal freedom, to gain respect from himself and from the people around him. A person capable of disobeying, and overcoming his own momentary desires is strong, capable of overcoming all kinds of difficulties. Meanwhile, his willpower is hard to break for those who wish evil to this individual. Restrained people are able to control themselves, their own actions, thoughts, emotions, deeds.

How to learn to control yourself and not get angry with others? How to learn to act correctly? Actions, as a result of which a person repents, are often committed in a state of emotional disregard and following deceitful feelings. There is absolutely nothing good that a person's emotions occupy an upper level above his reason. Everything should interact harmoniously, leading a person to success in the professional sphere, in his personal life and to inner peace of mind. Therefore, a person who wants to learn control must carefully analyze his own behavior and desires. Having done this, find "weak spots" where he allows you to give up the slack and allow emotions to take over.

Itzhak Pintosevich, a person who is a trainer of the success of human life, expressed the opinion that for the effectiveness and success of achieving self-control, control should consist of three components, which must develop simultaneously:

- first, the subject needs to learn to treat himself honestly, not to be deceived and not to create illusions around;

- second, control should exist in two planes: internal and external. By controlling the fulfillment of the assigned task, a person can tell his colleagues or friends about it, while promising them, if he does not complete it at the appointed time, to pay a fine. An external stimulus allows you not to be distracted by outside activities, but to go in the set direction;

- third, control of one's behavior should be carried out systematically and only. If an individual engages in self-control from time to time, it will be just a waste of time, and the person himself, confident in his efforts aimed at control, will complain about life, fate, and subsequently disappointment in his own life, since he did not succeed.

A person beginning to learn should make a list of goals, following the appropriate hierarchy. This list should always be in sight: on the desktop, on the refrigerator, on the wall that the individual sees when waking up. You need to control the actions performed every day, noting even the slightest progress towards the goal.

When you find yourself in a variety of situations, whether they are happy or sad, you should analyze what is happening and track your own reaction, what kind of emotional response comes out and at what moments.

Having identified the situations that cause a "storm of emotions", the individual needs to understand and realize whether what happened is worth such experiences. It is possible to present the worst solution to the situation, which will make it possible to realize which of the consequences will be more destructive for the psychological state of the individual: the consequences of the situation that happened or inadequate, emotionally thoughtless behavior.

For the release of accumulated negative energy, playing sports is well suited: any kind of wrestling or self-defense. The inner desire of the individual to get rid of negative emotions is important. This can be done in a different way, more loyal in relation to their own physical health and the health of others. For example, if an individual does not like a certain subject, so much so that the person is ready to get into a fight or simply destroy him, this really needs to be done. But you need to do it mentally! In a situation when a person becomes uncomfortable at the moment of communication with the subject of hatred, one should do everything mentally that one wants with this subject. It is also possible to use paper as a means to help get rid of negative emotions: you can draw a person whom you hate, and next to write down the problems that have arisen thanks to this person. Then the sheet should be burned, and mentally or even verbally put an end to the relationship with the person.

When faced with rudeness and injustice on a daily basis, an individual should not be upset and react violently every time. Without the ability to change circumstances, you just need to change your attitude towards them, it is much easier to cope with your own attitude.

The emotional state of a person is relatively strongly dependent on the state of his finances. You should keep under control your financial position, loans, expenses and income. The fewer gaps and problems in the direction of finance, the less there will be reasons to be distracted, pay attention and waste your energy.

Creating maximum comfort in the house, calmness in all affairs and relationships, the ability to influence what is happening at any time is the surest way to the ability to control your own emotional experiences.

How to learn to control yourself in alcohol

Self-control is a quality that consists not only in the ability to regulate emotions and feelings, but also in your habits, hobbies and actions. There are often many difficulties in controlling alcohol consumption. Alcohol is a certain kind of toxin, which is relatively difficult to quit, but many do not have such a desire. There is only a desire to learn how to control the edge of what is permissible. Many drinks with the presence of alcohol, getting into the body, show their effect not immediately, but after a certain time. It is for this reason that individuals who generally drink in small quantities are the most drunk of the whole large company.

There are several ways to learn to control yourself in alcohol and not be angry about the consequences.

The first thing an individual needs to do is to realize that drinking alcohol weakens a person's will, the ability to control his actions. Indeed, for many people, everything starts with drinking alcohol in a large circle of friends, in honor of the holiday. But this common use can escalate into overuse, no matter the situation. Over the course of a certain amount of time, the individual is faced with the circumstance that his life has qualitatively changed and dropped to a completely undesirable level of being.

The second step towards realizing alcohol regulation is realizing that drinking has become uncontrollable. It must be admitted to the individual that this has turned into his weakness. As soon as he admits that he is weak, the moment comes that can move the person further along the path of solving the problem.

Drinking alcohol alone should be avoided. “If it's just beer,” many will notice. Drinking beer becomes the source of the development of alcoholism, and leads to a form that is very difficult to cure. Companies that often drink should also be avoided, especially for no reason. It is important to learn your norm and always try to control it.

If an individual knows that in his free time he can easily go and knock over a bottle of alcohol, then the rules of free time should be established. Instead of a noisy company with alcohol and festivities until the morning, it is better to go to the cinema, theater, go for a run. You need to lead the most active lifestyle, find a hobby that will bring the same pleasure as alcohol. But if you have to go to a holiday that involves drinking, you should clearly define the amount of alcohol that will be drunk. It will be even better if your friend or girlfriend knows about it, who can also control it.

You should learn to set yourself the goal of a healthy lifestyle, deriving pleasure without using any toxins.

How to learn to control your appetite

A large number of girls ruin their health with various diets and starvation in order to lose weight, which is considered superfluous, to get in shape to please men. After some time of inactivity, girls again gain weight, this leads to irritability, anger, sometimes to depression. Nutrition experts argue that a more effective way to lose weight is only to regulate your own appetite. That is, you should learn to recognize the desires of the body itself, how to satisfy them, while controlling your appetite. Scientists distinguish different types of hunger, respectively, this requires different methods of control.

So there is a visual hunger when, passing by a display case with buns, a person notices a croissant or a pie, which instantly makes you want to eat it. The sight of food provokes the release of a certain set of hormones into the bloodstream, which provoke the feeling of hunger.

How to control visual hunger:

- a person should first of all switch to a completely different object. Figuratively speaking, to eat with the eyes of a nice guy walking by or the apple depicted on the poster;

- before taking food, it is worth considering it carefully, how delicious everything looks;

- even if the meal is taking place alone, the table setting should be perfect, right down to the color of the tablecloth and the correct position of the food on the plate.

Physiological hunger is a breakdown, rumbling in the stomach, headache. These are signs that the body needs to replenish its energy reserves.

How to control appetite:

- slowly take food, paying attention to the signals given by the body;

- stop among meals in order to assess the strength;

- do not confuse hunger or anxiety.

Gustatory hunger may be due to the desire to feel a special taste, something specific or original.

To control taste hunger you need:

- use the same product in different dishes (for example, steam fish, in the oven or make fish meatballs;

- try to diversify the food you take to the maximum, even if it wakes up something extraordinary.

You should also learn to ask yourself questions: "Is it worth it?", "Am I sure that I really want this?" Until you get the true answer to these questions, do not simply clog your stomach.

Speaker of the Medical and Psychological Center "PsychoMed"

All things, objects, all living beings are all one energy. There were yogis on earth who could eat nails. That is, to put it simply, there is no meaning that there is, because all this is one single energy. And they didn't see the difference between eating nails and eating bananas. They are just different forms of the same energy.

It is difficult to understand and even more so to accept and realize.

The earth has met many such people who could do something that an ordinary person cannot. It all seems strange, mysterious, stupid and implausible to us, but who knows how it really is.

This is beyond the control of our minds, but does it mean that it is not?

But it is not only about visible and tangible objects. This also applies to our feelings and emotions, thoughts. All this is one energy. Fear comes from the same energy as joy. But they just appear in various forms that are understandable for us, our body, our body, our mind.

You can imagine a beautiful sexy woman or a man (depending on what gender you are) and after a while you will feel the reaction of your body. But there is no one around, you are alone. Why is this happening? Your thoughts have become the source of body change. You imagined, you thought, and you got a physical response. Everything is born in us.

Accordingly, we ourselves can control our emotions and reactions to them. But that's okay. We look further.

Let's continue with sexual energy. By itself, it is of little use to us. This is the desire of the opposite sex. But in it, as I have said more than once on the pages of the site, tremendous power is hidden... But how to do it in such a way as to feel it for yourself.

One of the ways to transform it and transform it for possible use is the method of focusing on the energy of this feeling.

How to learn to control your emotions?

You don't need to do anything special for this. The energy of emotion will do everything by itself.

Our task is simply to feel the emotion or feeling as energy in the body. And she transforms herself.

This is not just about sexual energy. It also works with feelings of fear, despair, sadness, frustration. This applies to all feelings and emotions. In terms of energy, all emotions are no different from each other.

Emotion can be felt inside your body.

Also, just as you might feel the energy of sexual arousal, you can simply try to feel the energy of fear when you are very scared. Just stop and listen carefully to yourself. You will understand that this emotion is concentrated somewhere in one place of your body, you can feel it as something that is inside you.

This is not just something abstract, you will clearly feel it. It is right here and now right in this place.

It is the sensation, the perception of one's emotion as energy, that transforms and transforms it.

Our experiences and worries do not arise out of the blue, but always have their own reasons for this. And they excite us most of all. We think about the reasons for the fear, about who or about who caused it. About the consequences. Thus, we drive ourselves even more into it. As I said, all emotions are born in us. We are their source.

We need to discard unnecessary thoughts about stories related to emotion. You just need to concentrate on the feeling itself, as in our example, fear.

The practice of transformation. Meditation.

How to learn to control your emotions through meditation? Transformation is best done in form.

Let's try.

The purpose of meditation... Feel emotion as energy, as created from it, direct your attention to it.

We don't think about how to transform energy or sublimate it when it comes to sexual energy. We simply focus our attention on emotions as energies. And that's all. The transformation happens by itself.

Let's try to use the energy of fear for meditation. Although, of course, you can try to remember those moments in life when you were very happy about something. Choose any emotion you want.

Remember, this is just energy. She has no characteristics, neither good nor bad.

Now I will try to describe the process of meditation, you will understand how it is done and you can practice it without any problems.



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Emotions make a person's life bright, add spice to the peaceful course of life. Declaration of love evokes delight, babbling - tenderness, a beautiful sunset gives a feeling of harmony with nature ...

However, not all emotions are positive - fear, anger, resentment, anger bring destruction with them, and laziness and despondency inhibit personality development. Destructive experiences break families, break friendships, interfere with careers, and generally make life difficult.

Under the influence of negative feelings, a person is often unable to control himself, therefore, he may commit acts or say words that he will later regret, or may not dare to commit an act and will also regret it.

People who do not know how to control the manifestation of their emotions can lose too much:

To prevent this from happening, it is important to be able to manage yourself, your feelings. Consider how to learn to control your emotions.

Where to begin?

The first step in the difficult process of mastering our own feelings can be understanding the fact that our emotions are our problems, or rather, a reflection of our problems. We react painfully only in those cases if our "sore spot" is touched. It is necessary to move from “he pisses me off (offends, hurts me on purpose)” to the understanding that “I myself am nervous (shouting, taking offense, swearing, and so on)”. It is important to understand why these particular words or actions caused negative experiences. Hear yourself. Only the feeling of one's own feelings, personal responsibility for them, creates the basis for controlling emotions. After all, it is impossible to defeat something if you do not know what it is and where it comes from.

Emotional Management

Psychologists have developed several fairly effective methods for controlling emotions.

Contrary action

In a stressful situation, when the possibility of breaking is high, you can try to act on the contrary. For instance, if you really want to call opponent with bad words, compliment him, and if you want to scream, speak in a calm, even voice ... Most likely, learning to apply this method of behavior in case of conflict will not work right away. But over time, you will develop a habit of restraining yourself.

5 easy steps

Following these 5 simple yet effective steps will usually lead to the desired result. Repeat these exercises at a time when destructive feelings require an explosion, and you will be able to learn how to control your emotions.

Pity for the offender

Oddly enough it sounds, but it is worth showing imagination and imagine why it is so strong trying to offend you a person, in word or deed, will immediately become easier. Everyone knows that aggression is a manifestation of one's own problems, uncertainty, disorder, and often cowardice. Therefore, having imagined what is the reason for this behavior of the offender, you can experience a feeling of pity instead of anger.

For instance, elderly woman scandal on public transport for no apparent reason. In this situation, one can immediately imagine that this unfortunate grandmother lives in a family in which no one listens to her opinion and does not even allow a word to be said. She is afraid of her daughter's reaction to any of her comments, and her grandchildren do not at all consider her a person.

After such reflections, it is no longer possible to be angry with the scandalous old woman. She only wants to feel sorry for her.

Prayer, meditation

Both ways of pulling yourself together are very similar.

Prayer will help a believer find peace. While reading the prayer, the thoughts of the person praying aimed at talking to God, there is a feeling of security. A person is distracted from many small problems, which means that he switches his attention and is distracted from the quarrel. After reading the prayer, it will become impossible to continue the scandal.

Meditation works the same way. This technique was originally aims to finding peace in the midst of the hustle and bustle of life. This is achieved by focusing on something. When switching the mind, a person manages to escape from an unpleasant situation. The more you practice meditation, the more effective it will be when destructive emotions arise.

Visualization

This method will help control their feelings for those who have a developed imagination.

First rendering several times it may turn out wrong, but over time, when it is possible to accurately select the image of your safe place, to feel it, this method can become one of the most effective of all, helping to control the sphere of emotions and giving relaxation and tranquility.

Eliminate stress with the power of thought

This is one of the options for the visualization discussed above. Any feeling that interferes with life can be mentally removed from your life. For this this feeling should be presented as a real object and destroy it. For example, they presented an offense in the form of a blank sheet of paper - you can safely burn it, if the experience is presented in the form of a stone - throw it deep into the sea or throw it into the abyss, etc. At the moment of destroying the image of your troubles, it is important to feel how they leave you, which becomes easier without them. And in the meantime, experiences fly further and further and will never return.

Physical activity is a great way to quickly "dump" accumulated destructive emotions.

Do not underestimate the role of physical activity when it comes to learning how to control your emotions. The notorious cymbal beating can be helpful in trying to take control of your senses.

Feature of physical activity is that they give us the opportunity to throw out all the negativity during training or performing any other actions. What can you direct your energy to in moments that threaten with emotional explosions?

Sports activities

Psychologists believe that the best sports for this purpose are all types of wrestling, boxing, as well as quieter, but requiring increased concentration, bowling and darts. The main thing, when performing sports elements, is to give yourself a mindset to release the negative.

Cymbal breaking can become such an almost sports activity. Need to buy cheap dinner plate set and in anger to smash everything without regret. Naturally, you need to think in advance in which place it is more convenient to do this, and after the end of the process of beating the plates, remove the trash after you, wherever you are. This method is effective not only for you, but also for your opponent, if he is nearby.

Scream

Oddly enough, your negative emotions can be scream out if you do it from the heart. Naturally, public places are not suitable for this kind of prevention. You should shout in an open field or in a forest where no one can hear you. But after screaming, you can experience true relief.

Walking and traveling

Walking in the fresh air can also be of great benefit. Walking leisurely, looking at streets, houses, passers-by or some plants, the person gradually switches attention from their agitated state and unpleasant experiences to other objects or objects. If a pleasant companion takes part in the walk, then switching will occur even faster. And in this case, it is important with an effort of will to try not to concentrate on the negative, but to pay attention to what is happening around.

A change of environment helps you control your emotions. As well as during a walk, this method helps to switch to new sensations and new experiences. Only these new strong emotions will last longer, they will support you in difficult times for a long time.

Hobby

Doing what you love will bring peace to your soul anyway. Favorite business is and relaxation, and meditation, and visualization together with deep breathing combined. A person, carried away by an interesting business for him, forgets about everything, and about troubles too. He has no time to savor his grievances or be angry with others, because his thoughts, his hands, his eyes are busy. So, work hard, do what you love!

As you can see, the ways control emotions many have been developed, because the article contains only a few of them. Anyone can learn to manage their feelings if they want to. This will make not only your life more enjoyable, but also the life of the people around you.

Basically, there is nothing wrong with any emotion, but some of them can cause problems if you do not control yourself. Fortunately, there are a number of techniques you can use and lifestyle changes to help you deal with negative feelings.

Steps

How to reconfigure your mind and body

    Notice situations where emotions get out of hand. The first step is to notice that there is a problem. Pay attention to the physical and mental sensations in this situation so that you can recognize the symptoms later. Use mindfulness, conscientiousness and rational thinking to “catch” the moment. The ability to recognize emotion alone will only create an attachment to the present moment.

    Start doing the opposite of what you normally do. Stop if you are responding to an acute emotion in a familiar way. Think about what happens if you try to do the opposite. How will the bottom line change? If he becomes positive or productive, then opt for a new reaction.

    Remove yourself from a situation that generates negative emotions. Sometimes the best solution is to just walk away and hide from the irritants. If the situation allows you to leave and not offend others, then it is better to do so.

    • For example, if you are assigned to a work committee whose members behave unassembled, such meetings can upset you. One way to solve the problem is to ask to be transferred to another committee.

How to communicate confidently and decisively

  1. Express your feelings clearly and confidently. Learn to express your feelings vigorously in order to give vent and control your emotions, but at the same time change the unwanted situation. It's okay to express your opinion or deny others something that makes you uncomfortable or for which you simply don’t have time, if you’re polite and straightforward.

    • For example, if a friend invites you to a party, you might say, “Thank you for remembering me! Alas, I do not like big companies, so this time I will refuse. Maybe we’ll go to a coffee shop together? ” Let your feelings out so they don't sit inside and control you.
  2. Speak in the first person to express yourself without blaming others. This way of communication allows you to express emotions and not blame or humiliate anyone. Before you say anything accusing or judgmental, stop and reformulate the sentence into your usual observation or your own opinion.

    • For example, instead of saying: “You don’t care about me,” it’s better to say: “I was hurt when you didn’t call me back, although you promised. What happened? "
  3. Invite others to share their point of view. Each situation is multifaceted. Encourage others to share their thoughts to better understand their point of view and engage in equal dialogue. You should actively listen to control yourself, control your emotions, and be in a mental state that will help you use other people's ideas wisely.

    • For example, when expressing your opinion, supplement it with the question: "What do you think?"
  4. Don't use subjective words like “should” and “should”. Such statements blame others and can lead to feelings of irritation and anger because the situation is not going the way you would like it to be. If you say “should,” “must,” or similar words or phrases, stop and remember that we are not all perfect. Accept the imperfection of the world and the current situation.

    • For example, instead of thinking, “My partner should never hurt my feelings,” remind yourself that there is nothing personal about the situation. Both of you make mistakes from time to time.
    • If you are too hard on yourself, show kindness and compassion. For example, if thoughts like, “I should have been better prepared. I will fail the exam, ”then change them to the following:“ I did my best and prepared as best I could. Whatever the outcome, everything will be all right. ”

How to calm yourself down with a routine

  1. Exercise regularly to relax and let off steam. Do physical activities that include calming and repetitive activities (swimming, walking, or running) to calm the mind and senses. You can also try yoga or Pilates to calm your thoughts with calm warm-ups and breathing exercises.

    Engage different senses in new ways to calm your body. Learn to notice beauty and discreetly admire the world around you in order to take care of yourself every day. Your focus on gratitude and physical feelings will help you quickly pull yourself together in times of stress or irritation. Experiment with different methods:

    Use a soothing touching method. People need loving touch to feel happy. Positive touch releases oxytocin, a powerful hormone that improves mood, relieves stress, and enhances feelings of attachment. Common options for soothing touching include:

    • Put your hand on your heart. Feel your heart beating, your chest rising and falling, and warmth radiating from your skin. Repeat to yourself pleasant words like, "I am worthy of love," or, "I am a good person."
    • Hug yourself. Cross your arms over your chest, place your palms on your shoulders, and hug yourself gently. Repeat a positive phrase like, "I love myself."
    • Grasp your face with your palms like a child or loved one, and then begin stroking your face with your fingers. Repeat kind words to yourself like, "I am a wonderful and kind person."
  2. Practice meditation . Meditation is a great way to relieve anxiety and depression, and learn how to deal with stress. Regular mindfulness meditation can help you control your emotions. Sign up for a class, follow the online guidelines, or learn mindfulness meditation on your own at home.

    Repeat self-affirmations and mantras to yourself. The main principle of awareness is the ability to accept your current feelings without resistance or judgment. This is easier said than done, but through practice, mindfulness meditation techniques will soon become your new “habits”. In a difficult situation, repeat supportive phrases like the following to yourself:

    • "Feelings are fleeting and these emotions will soon pass."
    • "My feelings and thoughts are not hard facts."
    • “I don’t have to be led by emotions.”
    • "I'm fine, even though I feel uncomfortable."
    • "Emotions come and go, how many times have they already been."

How to achieve lasting peace

  1. See the root of emotional situations to solve the problem. If you often find it difficult to keep your emotions under control, then try to dig deeper and understand yourself. Learning about the root causes of emotional distress can help you decide how best to accept and deal with the situation.

    Question attitudes and actions that are based on fear or irrationality. Learning about the root causes of emotional upheaval allows you to counteract and even deal with certain beliefs. Take a detached view of the situation and objectively assess negative beliefs such as fear or inappropriateness. What caused these toxic feelings? How can you deal with them?

Big and ardent hello to everyone! An integral part of the development of any person is the management of their emotions. It's great if you are the type of person who knows how to control themselves. And if not? Emotions are, first of all, humanity. There is nothing wrong with their manifestation, but they need to be shown correctly, without overdoing it. Sometimes, we do not notice our behavior, which contains irritation, anger, anger and other unpleasant emotions. Let's take a closer look at how exactly you need to control them. Pay attention to yourself and try to contain everything that is, in fact, negative.

What is all this for?

Why control your emotions at all, you ask? Feelings always begin to take control over a person if he cannot take them into his own hands. Behavior becomes cheeky, bad, and sometimes even strange. A person is capable of rash and crazy actions if he does not control his feelings. Reasonableness and correctness lose their purpose. As a result, we first create things, and only then we regret what we have done. Moreover, it is easier to deceive a person who is too emotional, to put pressure on pity, to play on self-esteem. Emotions are that part of ourselves that can take us by surprise at any moment, at the most crucial moment in life. At the snap of a finger, they can destroy all our plans, interfere with intentions.

The constant change of emotions makes it difficult to communicate with many people. So, suddenly surging feelings can knock off the assigned course, "throwing" a person to the right, then to the left. Do you really want to live like a pendulum? Distraction not emotions only dulls the perception of the world by a person. In such a hurricane of feelings, it is very difficult to find yourself, to understand the depth of your desires and needs. And is there any happiness with harmony if you live every day like on a volcano? Many people compare the flow of emotions to a drug. That's right: these feelings invisible to the human eye can paralyze the will. This is why independence from your own inner experiences is very important. In life, you need to be a self-confident person who can achieve unprecedented heights and enormous goals.

What emotions need to be controlled?

If a person could only restrain negative feelings, then everything would be much easier. It turns out that even positive moments can play a cruel joke. Here it is better to put it this way: those emotions that bring only suffering to his owner and the people around him, who make him do hateful things - they should be taken under control. It turns out that it is worth managing those feelings that can deprive a person of freedom of choice. For example, if you are unlucky at work due to being too sociable and cheerful, then you don't need to behave like that in a place where people do not appreciate it. Moreover, if such sociability leads to trouble. Of course, the most terrible emotions are familiar to absolutely everyone, you don't even need to list them. Now think about whether they interfere with your life or not.

The three classes of the emotional world

All our vices can be classified into several groups. These are the worst emotions that can manifest itself.

  1. Ego... The hidden personality of every person, which is unlikely to show itself like this right away. This can include excessive attention to oneself, praise, privileges, social recognition, superiority over other people. Another manifestation of the human Ego is pride, envy and constant thirst for more, i.e. wealth. You can list it endlessly: bragging, gloating, vanity, selfishness. Remember that the Ego is a powerful source. It is like a support for all emotions. Therefore, all our feelings come from the inner Self.
  2. Weaknesses. This includes weakness, lack of will and a complete lack of internal control. Laziness, sadness, despondency, constant, passive behavior, depression, lack of independence, thoughtless behavior, dependence on others, fear and cowardice. If we complain about something, give up, cry and do not want to cope, then we are seized by weakness. It is very often called the most "snotty" and "unhappy" emotion.
  3. Thirst for experience. Alas, even strong feelings and physical pleasures should be in moderation. Lust, gluttony, thrills, gambling addiction, sexual urges are all manifestations of a thirst for experience. These are the strongest emotions that many are unable to restrain, since people get indelible pleasure from all this.

Let all these three emotional groups be the whales on which the whole world, woven from human feelings, rests.

How to control your emotions: basic rules

  1. Stop in time... The important thing about self-control is the ability to control yourself and stop. Here you need to learn to think about an act / word, and only then - say or do it. It is very valuable when it is competent and balanced. Before yelling at a person, say something to him - take a deep breath, which will help to pull yourself together. Think first of all with your head. This stage is an obligatory basis for the rest.
  2. Ability to distance yourself from what is happening. Life is full of situations when people take out the rest of the negative on a person. This can be both at work and at home. In many cases, it will be more correct not to react to the outburst of emotions in your direction; you should not respond in kind to people. The best way is to distract from what is happening. Try to abstract from the quarrel, imagine something sweet and pleasant. Moreover, if you have a good imagination, then everything will certainly work out.
  3. The surprise effect. Imagine a boss yelling at a subordinate at work. It would seem that the most typical reaction of an employee is confusion, the search for any excuses, or, conversely, rudeness in response. All this, by the way, is expected by the boss when he raises his voice to the employee. But what if we apply an extraordinary way out? It is usually called "shock therapy". After your boss finishes lecturing, try to respond with positive emotion and see what happens next. It doesn't matter what exactly it will be: a song, a dance, a compliment or a verse. But there will be no limit to the boss's shock, and you will contain the negative outburst of emotions. Thus, it is possible to show the management that the method of influence by shouting is simply useless - all this leads to the normalization of communication in balanced tones and a positive attitude.
  4. Self-hypnosis method. Do not forget one simple idea: whatever kills us only makes us stronger. The next time you have to withstand a heap of negative emotions, think that all this only strengthens. All this means that in the future in life you will be more persistent, and it will be very difficult to break you. This is the most real creation of the core, which will always lead to success in life. All this will allow you not to deviate from the principles, and also strengthen self-control over yourself.
  5. Religion. Don't forget about faith. Many people, being completely alone in complete despair, can always turn to God. Only faith remains with a person through life. In the most desperate situations, it is prayer that plays a key role. Take a deep breath, forget all offenses, turn to God, tell about all your experiences. It is prayer that helps to stop, think about what has been and will be done, and make the right decision. Remember that God will always come to help if you turn to him.
  6. Sport. The most common method of self-control is exercise. Often times, people hear about someone expressing their emotions in the gym or in any other section. If you feel that you are overcome by anger, anger, despondency, then the most effective one hundred percent medicine is sports. Physical relaxation in many ways gives moral strength and stability. It is not for nothing that they say that there will always be a healthy mind in a healthy body. Remember all the famous athletes: they are distinguished by their calmness and cheerful attitude towards others, they have no anger. They let all the negativity go to workouts, leaving negative emotions in the training room. Even with a very busy schedule, you can go in for sports: for example, do it. There is nothing easier than getting up a little earlier to sit down and do push-ups several times. All this will add energy, help to wake up, and if exercise becomes a habit, then the physical form will become even better.
  7. Hobby. Everyone has a favorite hobby that becomes an outlet. Some hobbies come from childhood, others - at a later age. A person will always have something to do with which he will be happy to be distracted. At this time, everyone forgets about problems and morally rests, and this adds strength for further victories. If you don't have a hobby yet, but immediately find yourself in something. It helps a lot to gain self-control. Having gone into any business with your head, you will immediately forget about all the worst moments.
  8. Breathing exercises. It's not for nothing that many phrases begin with words like "take a deep breath." All this certainly helps to concentrate, which means - to pull yourself together. There are both physical and moral explanations for this. With a deep breath, the blood is well saturated with oxygen, which enters the brain. All this increases mental activity. From the point of view of moral perception, a person has time to weigh and think about a decision. If we associate this with a physical factor, then a deep breath is the most effective action for promptly making the right decision and controlling the emotional state.
  9. Emotional contamination. Avoid negative communication as much as possible. If you feel that people treat you badly or infect you with negative emotions, then stop it. Emotions are energies that are either good or bad. Do not hang on yourself someone else's burden of negative feelings. Communicate more with positive and friendly people. It is with them that you can exchange positive events and give each other joy. Perhaps these people will later become best friends who will always be with you in life.
  10. Proper nutrition. Our energy is food, fuel for humans. Everyone has a different body, which perceives this fuel in different ways. Many depend on what time we eat. If we overeat at night, we fall asleep very badly, because after 12.00 we are overwhelmed with energy. In the morning, when the body must be awake, we have no appetite, and we constantly want to sleep. An exhausted and sleepy person cannot make meaningful decisions. The level of self-control here is an order of magnitude lower than that of a healthy eater. But those who eat healthy food are easy-going and always confident in themselves. Their body works like a clock, and emotions are always under control.
  11. Rejection of bad habits. Smoking and alcohol, and any other bad habits - all this is addiction. Many people cannot concentrate until they smoke a cigarette. But there are situations in life when you need to make decisions, but there is no opportunity to smoke. The result is absent-mindedness, loss of composure, a surge of negative emotions. The less addiction a person has, the more free he is. All this means that you can do whatever you want with the mind. Such people will always have a head start over those who are full of bad habits. The sooner you quit smoking and alcohol, the sooner you will learn self-control. The quality of life will improve in many ways.

Emotion Control Exercises

In this article, there are enough excellent methods that help you find out exactly how you need to restrain and control your emotions. But all this will begin to act only after a person truly believes in himself, with all his soul and heart. You should never despair, whatever your life situation. And let this article be a beacon for you that will direct you on the path of well-being. Not far off is the day when, looking in the mirror, you will see not a loser who is embittered at life, but a promising, benevolent and successful person who certainly knows how to control himself and his emotions. Until next time!

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