How to cope with anxiety in a variety of circumstances? How to cope with anxiety before speaking in an exam, in public, competition or stage, how to calm down.

Uncontrollable excitement and emotional experience often negatively affects a person’s psychological state, creating discomfort, and final result, sometimes reducing all efforts to nothing.

You also need to understand that excitement and inner experience are not always in their pure form. Often, anxiety is simply a justified negative habit that has no objective basis.

First, let's look at the definitions.

What is excitement and experience?

Excitement- emotional experience for any reason, depriving a person of inner peace and the ability to think and act as effectively as possible. One of the reasons for the excitement may not be the person’s ability and...

What does anxiety lead to?

• To a loss of peace and self-control, and as a result – to inappropriate behavior.
• To an unpleasant feeling of uncertainty and weakness, which is generated by a lack of control and powerlessness.
• To loss of energy and entering a stressful state (experience burns internal energy).
• To distraction from the process (loss of focus and concentration).
• To negative results and failure to achieve the goal (I got worried, couldn’t pull myself together and concentrate).

For example, the man was so excited before performing on stage that his voice trembled from excitement and as a result he failed his exam and did not enter the conservatory.

The main thing you need to realize is that worry does not serve anything useful; it does not help solve a problem or achieve a goal. On the contrary, it only prevents a person from feeling calm and confident, thinking sensibly, analyzing and finding the best solutions in the process of achieving what they want.

Why do many people fail to cope with their anxiety and experience? What's stopping you?

As usual, subconscious or conscious errors—internal human programs—get in the way.

Error programs:

“Excitement is good, it helps, awakens energy, etc.” - this is stupidity, because worry is purely destructive and uncontrollable energy that only gets in the way. At the same time, anxiety burns the useful energy of consciousness.

“Excitement is normal, and the more serious the situation, the more anxiety there should be” is also nonsense. It is better that in a responsible situation, concentration and self-control grow, rather than frustration and worry.

“I worry that others will see that I care” (to make an impression, to arouse pity, etc.). You need to understand that pity is not respect, it is weakness.

The main reasons for anxiety and worry? So what should you do?

1. Internal fears and complexes. See the following articles for more details:

2. Lack of Self-Control Skills(the ability to extinguish and completely turn off internal experiences with the help of commands and will).

3. Thinking errors– not understanding what the excitement should be replaced with. When a person is worried, chewing on thoughts like “What if something doesn’t work out...”, “If only it would pass...”, etc. That is, when a person in his own mind thinks up something for himself, overwhelms himself, chews, instead of directing his mind, his thoughts to solving the task at hand.

All thinking errors should be replaced by analysis, enumeration of options, finding the best solutions and taking the right psychological attitude “for results, for victory” (like athletes at the Olympics).

4. Mastering techniques for relieving tension and tightness, learning to purposefully relax and calm the mind.

• (this article presents techniques for calming the mind and turning off emotions and experiences)

It is important to understand! Removing the habit of worrying in principle and eliminating worry in a specific situation are completely different tasks! There are a lot of articles on the Internet with recommendations for somehow extinguishing current anxiety and relieving the emotions of experiences. But this does not mean that if you remove the experience now, it will not return tomorrow when you find yourself in a similar situation.

Therefore, if you really want to cope with anxiety once and for all, you need to understand and remove the individual causes of anxiety. Those reasons that are listed in this article or your purely individual reasons, which you still need to be able to correctly identify.

To understand and remove the individual causes of experiences, the best thing I can recommend to you is to work with or.

Excitement is an unconscious psychological state into which a person enters when various circumstances arise, most often associated with general attention from others. About that in various life situations, can be read in many manuals on self-government. However, knowledge alone is not enough, since it also requires the ability to own one’s own mental state.

The ability to manage oneself is one of the most difficult tasks for every person, since most people find it quite difficult to cope with various emotional states and, even more so, try to control them. Excitement manifests itself differently for everyone, but most often a person begins to blush, trembling appears in his hands and voice, a feeling of embarrassment arises and a desire to get rid of unnecessary attention to his own person. It should be noted that mankind has not yet invented a cure for anxiety, and therefore everyone finds for himself the ways with which he can maintain composure and not show it to others.

1. Watch your breathing. Here it will be very useful to master some yoga techniques that will allow you to perform a number of specific exercises in a minimum amount of time and achieve calm and even breathing. It is directly related to our mental state, and therefore through it we can pull ourselves together and calm down.
2. Self-hypnosis using internal orders. Develop for yourself several commands with a positive attitude, through which you can give instructions for certain actions. More detailed information on how to cope with anxiety using self-hypnosis can be found in many manuals on social psychology, tips that are worth taking advantage of.
3. Physical activity. When nervous, a person unconsciously becomes constrained, as a result of which his movements may be somewhat unnatural. You shouldn't stand still either. Here it is better to walk slowly (if possible) and try to concentrate on other things, not paying attention to the people around you. You just need to imagine that they are not there. With proper training this can be learned.

A fairly common problem among students is that during an exam (and especially before it), knowledge completely slips out of their heads due to extreme anxiety. This, in turn, leads to even greater psychological stress, as a person can subconsciously program himself for failure. How to cope with exam anxiety or reduce its level to a minimum? In order to prevent this from happening, you should, first of all, give yourself a psychological mindset in advance that you can calmly and measuredly give the correct answer to any question in the exam. You should never focus on failure.

Almost half of all people begin to blush when excited, and awareness of this further aggravates the process. Redness of the cheeks is a natural reaction of the body, which occurs as a result of a rush of blood to the upper skin. It is precisely because this is very noticeable that many people are concerned about the question of how not to blush when excited and maintain a natural complexion. The answer here also lies on the surface and directly depends on how much a person can control his emotional condition.

Unfortunately, effective universal recipe No one has yet come up with a solution to anxiety, so everyone decides for themselves how to cope with anxiety. Some prefer to shoot psychological stress with the help of alcohol, however, this is highly discouraged, as it can turn into a bad habit.

Thus, summing up all of the above, we can draw the main conclusion: you should control your psycho-emotional state, using every opportunity, and also gain experience in public speaking. In the end, with due diligence, you will learn to manage yourself in a variety of situations.

Scientists and practicing psychologists have studied in detail the question of how to cope with anxiety. Common advice is to develop self-confidence. However, it is difficult to follow it in those moments when we worry about loved ones, are anxious in anticipation of an event that is significant for us.

According to psychologists, an attempt to drive anxiety inside, to hide it behind a mask of indifference or seriousness is dangerous for the individual. Emotional stress, feelings of anxiety and fear do not disappear as a result, but are driven deep into the subconscious, accumulate and can unexpectedly come out later, and in an inappropriate situation.

A more productive and personally beneficial approach is to look an unpleasant emotion in the face. We bring to your attention unusual, but proven methods that successfully help cope with anxiety.

Letting ourselves worry

Psychological reception built on a paradox: you allow yourself to experience excitement. We begin to act with the appearance of the first alarming symptoms - scrolling through obsessive thoughts, shaking hands, a rush of heat to the head, etc.

At this moment, try to use your willpower to distract yourself from a frightening situation from external reality - an upcoming speech or an unpleasant conversation, the silence of a loved one. Concentrate on your own feelings and begin to praise yourself exaggeratedly for your ability to experience excitement, for example, in the following expressions:

• I love being excited, it's so fun!
• I become simply irresistible when I worry!
• My ability to worry is part of my perfect personality!
• Long live my excitement and such a wonderful trembling of my hands! and so on.

The effectiveness of the psychological technique is explained by the acceptance of the situation: the emotion is recognized and not hidden. The subconscious does not build an unpleasant scenario for the development of events due to distraction from the frightening reality. Exaggerated admiration for oneself layers on excitement and dissolves it.

Substituting concepts

This method helps to cope with anxiety in a situation of anticipation of an alarming event. It is difficult to instill confidence and calm in yourself, but it is possible to deceive the subconscious, get rid of the repetition of an unpleasant result and the feeling of anxiety.

You are expecting an interview and are worried, imagining a possible failure. The algorithm of actions is simple.

1. The day before, in a private environment, honestly answer yourself what you do best, one hundred percent: repairing computers or cars, stewing meat or beautiful haircuts, solving mathematical problems.
2. Concentrate and imagine: tomorrow you need to go, for example, to repair your laptop. You use images, verbal suggestion - it doesn’t matter. The purpose of the exercise is to achieve peace of mind and confidence.
3. The desired state has been captured - it should be fixed with a simple gesture: twist the handle, sharply squeeze the thumb and forefinger.
4. Before starting the interview, you should repeat the selected gesture. The anxiety will disappear instantly.

Let's make ourselves laugh

Laughter has been successfully used as a medicine to break the habit of worry. The psychological technique is ideal for people who are able to create colorful mental images. The goal is to make yourself laugh and remove the veneer of horror from an event that causes uncontrollable excitement.

A typical example. You are guilty before a loved one, an unpleasant conversation awaits - an explanation. Terrible pictures are scrolling through my head, my soul is filled with doubt: whether he will forgive or not. Try to imagine your opponent in a funny image: a huge baby in a diaper, with bunny ears, or in an astronaut suit. Similar games Imagination will help you calm down and remove internal unpleasant expectations. The result is that the right words will appear on their own during the conversation.

We realize the naturalness of excitement

Let's turn to explanatory dictionary. The main meaning of the word "excitement" is associated with natural phenomena: periodic movements of the water surface, the occurrence of waves. As in nature, the appearance of an unpleasant emotion for us is a natural process caused by specific reasons. There is no point in berating yourself for feeling nervous.

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Instructions

3. Think about the upcoming performance. As you reflect on it, you will feel changes in your emotional and physical sphere. Fear and anxiety will arise. Your task is to trace precisely the physical manifestations of these emotions. They usually manifest themselves through increased heart rate, various sensations in the chest and abdomen, “tugging in the pit of the stomach,” etc. You can tune into the emotions of fear and excitement and feel them as certain clots pulsating in the body.

4. Now imagine the performance situation more clearly. Imagine that you are standing in front of an audience and people are looking at you. Pay close attention to all the sensations that excitement and fear give rise to in you. And stop for a while. You are mentally in the performance situation and focused on your feelings. Don't be afraid of your feelings. They are not able to harm you.

5. Allow your negative feelings to be present in you, do not try to get rid of them, just feel them, experience excitement and fear, but consciously. This will take some time. Perhaps 10 to 30 minutes. At some point, you will notice that your negative feelings, if you do not fight them, but simply live them carefully, will begin to melt. You will be able to experience the peak of anxiety in advance, rather than in the performance situation, and thus the situation itself will be calmer and more constructive.

Video on the topic

Frequent problems in life include turmoil, stress, and nervousness. Almost every day there is excitement about certain events and activities. A small amount of water helps overcome excessive anxiety. In addition to the calming effect, it also has a number of other equally important beneficial properties.

Drinking water when nervous. Why does this work?

During stressful situations, a person is focused on a specific thought or problem. He does not know from this depressing experience. But there is still a way out. When drinking water, attention is extroverted: it is transferred from the problem to the performance of a certain action. Attention is directed to the sensations inside the body after drinking water.

Drinking water during stress

During stress, the heart, kidneys and blood vessels work with increased load, so they intensively release moisture. This happens as a result of how the heart, quickly pumping blood throughout the body, forces all organs and tissues that need a certain amount of moisture to work harder. During stress, the body temperature rises, a person becomes hot, and therefore the amount of moisture also decreases. This is one of the reasons for drinking water when nervous.

It also helps restore heart rhythm. Therefore, it is recommended to take several small sips if you are very nervous. In addition, drinking water is a purely psychological moment. At this moment, a person’s emotions shift from negative to neutral, and this, to a certain extent, helps relieve stress. Chewing and swallowing movements have a calming effect. While drinking water, increased sweating during excitement is compensated, and the attention of the central nervous system is also diverted. nervous system from voltage and sent to water recycling.

Worry is a habit that needs to be broken immediately.

Anxiety is stress, and it is no secret that during stress, blood pressure increases. As a result, biochemical reactions in the body are enhanced. And water is needed for these reactions to occur successfully. During excitement, the level of adrenaline increases, which travels through the blood directly to the heart, causing it to work faster. Water reduces (as if dissolves) the level of adrenaline in the blood, therefore the heartbeat decreases. The man calms down.

Water is a source of energy

Water like depressant- a very valuable source. After all, excitement makes the heart beat faster due to the adrenaline released into the blood. Regular intake of water will calm your nerves and maintain a balanced state during an anxious moment. If you always remember this, you can remain calm in any situation. stressful situation.

Tip 6: How to help your child cope with anxiety before a performance

Mothers often face the issue of child anxiety. The emotional stress of child athletes is sometimes no less than physical, the intensity of passions is colossal. The excitement of child artists before going on stage is comparable only to a tsunami wave. I want to help with words and advice, but sometimes the child’s reaction is so unpredictable that you involuntarily start looking for advice on the Internet.

You will need

• Patience and time, love and understanding!

Instructions

How do you, as an adult, cope with anxiety? Are you screaming, nervous, crying, silent, biting your nails? A child often copies the behavior of his parents in a stressful situation. Take a closer look at your child’s behavior, ask how he/she feels, try to objectively assess the similarity with your behavior. Found any similarities? Change yourself, be an example! Over time you will see changes!

If you are afraid of speaking in front of people, then do it as often as possible. You can start with own family. Gather your family around the table and read the report to them. Close people will tell you where you lost your thoughts, where you forgot to switch the slide in the presentation, and so on. The next stage is to increase the number of performances. Don't refuse the opportunities presented to you, practice. Controlling your voice, body, and your own emotions is a skill that can be developed.

Method No. 2

To feel confident when you have to speak in front of other people, prepare for the upcoming event. The materials you plan to present must be verified down to the decimal point. Show printouts of your speech to your colleagues, they may give valuable advice. Think about what you will wear at the performance, what hairstyle and makeup you will wear. You must look perfect. Anticipate possible incidents. Bring spare tights to the performance; if the ones you’re wearing suddenly start to crease, put a second lipstick in your purse. The slightest nuances are not noticeable to others, but any woman behaves more confidently if she feels her own attractiveness.

Another stage of preparation is rehearsals. You can practice in front of a mirror. But it is difficult to read and analyze at the same time. Don’t be lazy and film your performance rehearsal on camera. After reviewing the recording, work on your mistakes. Consider what questions your audience might have and prepare answers to them in advance. If you do this, the risk of ending up in an awkward position will be reduced to almost zero.

Method No. 3

The vast majority of people experience severe anxiety about making a mistake in front of other people. Nobody in the world is perfect. And you included. You won't get fired and the world won't turn upside down because you slip up or drop your pen. Think about how to behave if you do make a mistake. Watch news anchors on national TV channels. Even they do not always pronounce a difficult word the first time. But then they apologize, smile and continue reading the text further. Take this technique into your arsenal.

Method No. 4

Imagine that you will not be speaking in front of department heads or skeptical people business partners, but in front of friends. True friends will listen to you with interest and forgive you minor mistakes. Your audience is not a hostile force, but people who want to learn new information.

You shouldn’t have a big lunch before a performance, but you shouldn’t go hungry either. It is better to limit yourself to a light snack that can satisfy your hunger.

Method No. 5

Psychologists recommend not to think about the white monkey. No, no, this is not a game of a fevered imagination at all. If someone tells you not to think about the white monkey, all your thoughts are bound to be about him. It's the same with anxiety. Everyone around you will try to support you, encourage you and, of course, tell you not to worry. This is exactly what can throw you off track. Nod, say “thank you,” and move your thoughts to another topic. Think not about your emotions, but about solving the tasks at hand. When your head is occupied with numbers, terms and definitions, you will simply forget about fear of the public and emotional anxiety.

Method No. 6

Before public speaking you can hide in some secluded corner and do a few physical exercises: - move your lower jaw, because this will help relieve tension in the facial nerves; - clench your hands into fists several times, and then sharply relax your hands; - rub your palms together, massage your fingers (such simple gymnastics for the arms affects the reaction speed, relieves nervous “paralysis” of the speech apparatus); - jump in place, do a couple of bends to the sides; - stand on your tiptoes, stretch up, shake your arms.

Excitement provokes the release of an extraordinary portion of adrenaline into the blood, and physical exercise stimulate the production of lactic acid. When these two substances react in your body, the stress situation will fade into the background. You will begin to think faster and want to act actively.

Before going out to the audience, take 4-5 deep and slow breaths and exhalations.

Method No. 7

When you are in front of an expectant audience, don't start talking right away. Pause for 10-15 seconds. This will allow you to straighten out your ragged breathing, tune in to your report, and allow the audience to calm down and stop extraneous conversations. By the way, you should also control your breathing while giving a speech. The deeper and calmer you breathe, the more oxygen enters your lungs, and therefore your brain. Don’t be afraid to pause briefly during your presentation to catch your breath or take a sip of water.

Method No. 8

When the number of people looking at you causes panic, you should focus your gaze on one person. If there is a good friend in the room, start giving out information, looking only at him. If there is no such person, then you can choose any listener who is more or less sympathetic to you. After some time, find someone else and contact him. By looking from one person to another, you will calm down, and people in the hall will get the impression that you “talked” with each of them personally and paid attention to everyone.

Method number 9

This way to cope with anxiety is perhaps the most important. Think positively. Remember that all your thoughts are material. If you keep telling yourself, “Just don’t stumble,” you will definitely stumble. Say that everything will go well, that you are calm and confident, all reasons for concern are left at the door, and now the approval of others and dizzying success awaits you.